How often do you get criticized for your style?
How does it make you feel?
It hurts right?
Of course – most people’s opinion don’t
matter, but what about friends & family?
Your closest pals rip into you at the fact
that you upped your style.
Just when you’re feeling confident about a
positive change, someone tries to bring you down.
It’s inevitable – being criticized for how
you’re dressed.
You can’t seem to please everybody, not
all at once. Whatever people’s concept of perfect is, it’s unattainable.
Maybe that’s the way it is. Perhaps we’re
supposed to just handle our critics as they come along, whatever way we think
best.
Should we be defensive? Or shoot back with
a witty, sarcastic remark?
Channel your mind here by following
these tips in facing criticism – whether coming from brutal honesty or
arrogance – towards your style.
1. Understand
It’s A Reflection Of Them, Not Necessarily You
A lot of times, the fact that somebody’s criticizing has nothing
to do with you, and everything to do with them. It could be an inferiority
complex. They could be turned off by how much control you seem to have over
your style and image. It could be envy, or they simply started to think they no
longer know you.
That may happen more often when it comes
to the people close to you. It could be your friend, family member, boss or
colleague. If it seems like they resent the positive changes you’ve made to
your appearance, that’s a red flag. Your relationship might not be the
healthiest one.
The solution here would be
a conversation, not confrontation. Be polite and ask if the two of you
could talk. Smiling helps. You don’t want to give them the idea that they’re in
trouble or there’s a problem.
Once you’ve got your time and place, just
be cordial and natural. Start somewhere along the lines of, “I notice you’ve
been acting a bit differently since I…” Make the other person comfortable
enough to feel they can be honest with you.
You’ll go a long way by engaging in civil
conversation. It lets both parties hold a ceasefire, puts aside
passive-aggressive behavior. You get to hear their side of things, and it’s
your chance to explain why you’ve made those changes. By clearing that up, they
might be more accepting.
The foundation of any good relationship is
respect. You need it to call it a truce and rebuild bridges. However, you
also deserve respect from your critic. It’s your job to figure out whether
they’re concerned about you or just hating the style.
If it’s the latter, you’ll have to shake
it off. It’s not your fault if they can’t accept the new you. Distance yourself
from them if you can.
2. Routinely Question
Yourself – Take
The Critiques Of Others Into Some Consideration
Make this a precautionary measure from
time to time. When getting used to certain changes to your style or adopting
different ones, take a step back.
Are you really doing this for yourself?
Are you aiming for your inner self to shine its brightest? These are the
questions for you to keep in mind.
Never lose sight of the big picture – to
treat every day like you’ve got a job interview. You always want the best
version of yourself presented since you never know what opportunity might come
your way.
Remember its opportunity you’re after, not
attention. So every now and then, you should question whether your style might
be getting the kind of attention that’s driving away opportunity.
Here’s where criticism helps, especially
if it comes from people you trust. Compare yourself to a diamond in the rough –
uncut and unpolished when it’s first taken off the earth.
Understand the “flaws” in your style that
you didn’t originally see but can now work on. Learn to take in constructive
criticism as part of your self-development. Let your ego take the back seat.
As the Jewish proverb goes, “A man who
covers up his mistakes will never be prosperous.” You can’t always identify
every single mistake or area of improvement on your own. That’s why it helps to
get feedback on how others perceive you.
Make it a habit to question your stance on
style objectively. It will only help you become a better person
3. You’re A Leader – Leaders Are Never Universally Loved, Especially In Their Own Time
To stand your ground with your own style –
looking as sharp as you do – takes confidence.
Confidence is a great thing to have,
especially for a leader. And as you probably guessed, leaders aren’t usually
the most popular people around.
But there are lots of benefits to showing
your ability to lead. You convey a sense of authority, especially with a suit
and tie. You command attention instead of just blending into the background.
You earn yourself extra time to deliver a sales pitch or pass on an idea to
someone. That’s why you’ve got to go the extra mile in looking like a star.
So naturally, more attention could mean
more haters. Despite the old saying to not judge a book by its cover, many
people still do.
But that shouldn’t get in the way of how
you view yourself. You have to BELIEVE you’re a leader who excels and inspires.
If others think you’re a pompous jackass who craves attention, let them be.
As long as you’re confident and secure,
and you know your intentions, you’ll never have self-doubt. And you should
beware of self-doubt – it plants ideas in your head that “prove” you’re not
good enough.
4. Surround
Yourself with People You Can Share Stories With
Finally, don’t think you have to brave the world of scathing critics by yourself. Always know there are guys out there who are struggling the same way. Some might be worse off than you are at the moment.
Either way, it’s good to have a support
system. Even the toughest men aren’t immune to hurt feelings. We need to pat
each other’s backs once in a while.
